i went to Changi T1 to send my bro off for his Mt Kinabalu Expedition. exchanged small convo wif mr kwok, mr helmi and some SP juniors. e expedition group had a ‘circle’ talk/ briefing session where they will talk bout the objective of their trip blah blah blah. i felt so overwhelming listening to their pre-departure discussion.  I can sense their burning desire to scale the mountain. I had always enjoy gg for overseas trips with friends. the companion and bond forged during any trip is jus boomz. haha.

i missed SP days. in particular all those overseas trips!

mental breakdown.

im really scared.

]]> http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/10/09/it-is-just-one-of-those-days/feed/ 0 farhanjunior http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/09/21/428/ http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/09/21/428/#comments Mon, 21 Sep 2009 10:29:07 +0000 farhanjunior http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/?p=428 ]]>

it has been almost 2 weeks since i started live FX trading. I lost a total of $500.  in a matter of fact i lost more than tt amount as i actually did won approx $200.  I have to start gg bac to e FX classes. I nid more coaching. most of the losses i made was because i entered at the market at the wrong time. gosh.

i dreamt that a b747 crashed just aft taking-off from the runway at changi airport.

i dont know if i can succeed but i want to give it a go.

can i really achieve it?

i am really scared. its feels like i am running out of time.

the path is filled with obstacles.

im tired. seriously.

others might laugh at me.

its my dream tt keeps me moving forward.

and so aft 4 mths since i wrote tt letter….

I have passed out from TRACOM and did my family proud by receiving the Sword of Merit. I missed OCT training days. I managed to be posted to APD with much delight. i have a great office with an awesome view of the airport and runway.

I didnt sign up for my bachelors but went for a forex course instead. I felt that i would rather save tt $20K to fund for my Flying course in the future. However, i do fear for my future….. fear tt i would not achieve my dreams.

But I would not give up without giving it a try.

OBS had promised to send us this letter few months later aft our OBS program.  i had just received my OBS letter that i wrote to myself .it was written during our solo night. that faithful nite we were to write a reflection on our life.  it was a defining moment for me as it gave me the chance to really sat down and thought thru what i have actually done to my life, my OWN life. here is an excerpt from my letter. word for word. written 4 mths ago by myself.

Date: 10 04 09

Time: ???

Location: Somewhere in Ubin

Outward Bound School Singapore. For the record, this 16D OBS adventure program that i am going through right nw marked my 3rd time particapating in OBS. The first was during my NCC days. It was a 5D4N Mobile expedition. I belonged to Armstrong family. The second OBS experience was a 5D4N residential program. It was with my Secondary school, Teck Whye, and Bendemeer sec. And i was in Eng Soon. The 2nd experience was definitely the pinacle moment for me where i spent quality time with my sec mates and making new friends with the bendemeer peeps.

It is known to many that those who went through OBS program would come out a different man. It was said that OBS would groomed you to be a better leader, team player and individual. I was lucky to experience the program. Wait a minute. Lucky? Lucky? was i really lucky to be involved in all these????

I was the Coordinator for my Lower Secondary Prefectorial Board. I was made the Head Prefect during my final year in Secondary school. I was the Chairman for my school TKD club. I was my sch NCC unit sergeant major( USM). and at the same time, i received a best cadet award during the NCC Spec course. and finally I received the Most Outstanding Pupil Award during the sch annual speech day.

In primary school, if i can remember correctly, i was vice captain for my soccer team? and vice captain for my CARE(blue) house too? i was made the captain for the Mini-Tennis team. n was in the prefectorial board too.

Polytechnic days. I was in the Students’ Union. was in the Exco for three years. I held positions in Assistant sports coordinator, Sports Coordinator, Vice-President. Received excellence award in Sports category. But being part of the 19th MILE team was my most memorable experience in Poly. I just could not put in words the experience i gained from the trip to Japan.

Was i really lucky to be able to go through all this experience???

I have to thank certain people that gave me the opportunity to go through all the moment that had groomed me to what i have become of today. In primary school, Miss Veronica Foo was my form teacher. She had guided my graduating class for 2 yrs. i can still remember there was this moment where she broke down in tears during one of our class. My class had disappoint her in our studies? the bond she had created with our class was commendable. I still remember the time when she gave me my PSLE result, she congratulated me and told me to carry on working hard to achieve my dreams and wishes me all the best although i didnt do tt well in PSLE. Another teacher was Ms Jasmine Ho, my Prefectorial board’s mistress and my Mini-tennis Teacher IC. if im nt wrong, my batch was the first to form a mini-tennis team and she led our team as teacher IC throughout my stay in the team. i thanked her for making me the captain for the team. it made me feel that i was valued to the team.

In Secondary school. Great times. Was definitely the best time spent in my education history. Ms Shirlyn Mong was my lower sec form teacher. She has this one of a kind attitude. Her own kind of teaching style. She was defintely a strict teacher yet a caring one. What made her special to me was why did she chose me to be the lower sec prefect coordinator? why? what did she see me? i know that she was the one who decided to appoint me to be one but why me? And when she and Ms Sharena chose me to be Head Prefect, was i really the chosen one? Why me???? Ms Mong had definitely created the path for me to groom myself to be what i am today. Mdm Pua. I really love her classes. she is always motivating every student that we can acheive great results.  i had always love tourism topics and i had always chose to do the tourism question in all of her test.there was one time when she was giving out this particular  geography test paper result. when it was my turn, she gave me this disappointed face. she advised me in front of the whole class not to do tourism question as it had always been a tough question to score good marks. i felt really down. eventually, i scored A1 for humanities and i have to thank Mdm Pua as i did not do the tourism qn for the O lvls much to her advises.

Sometimes i tell myself if was a leader. Sometimes i tell myself if i was a effective leader. i feel that i did not perform well as a leader during my secondary school days. i didnt really made an impact to the school community. i was just there to fill up the position. true? i do not know. Only my school mates can answer to that.

Sometimes or rather i lacked the confidence to do public speaking. i always had the fear to be placed in front of large group of people to do public speaking. that is me. i am an introvert by nature. Weird huh given that i assumed influential positions. nevertheless i managed to perform the expectation duties. But i really really seriously have to thank all those who gave me the chance and the countless opportunity to be groomed as a valuable individual.

Dreams vs Career.

Back then in secondary sch, i had wanted to be in the sports industry. I had planned to go into the NYP sports management course as i can work in the industry in the future. i would love to be part of the Singapore Sports Council that planned and execute any promotion of sports in Singapore. Look what had become of Sports Industry in Singapore? It had progress tremendously rite? bt all hopes were dashed when i could not make an entry into the course. i failed my english in O lvls. i appealed to the school throwing everything i had, testimonials, certs, etc. i was rejected. i did not even made to the interview selection. and so i went to my next interest of study, Aviation. i took up a course in Aerospace Electronics in SP.

It was in SP that i managed to see and realised the power of education success. All those who performed well in studies were given great opportunities to achieve more. Look at the allocation of FYP projects. All those who performed well in yr 1 n yr 2 were given projects that were of  Spinnovex standards. n they were well look after. for my team n myself, since we were average students, we were left to die on our own. period. eventually, i did really poor for my studies. A GPA of 2.4. what if i gt so many acheivements in my CCAs? MERITOCRACY! only those who perform are rewarded. and i am stuck here where my diploma results had formed an imaginary limit to my entry level in any industry.

I did not apply to any University. i believed that wif my results, i cant even enter into local Uni. i did not try. I sld join RP instead. So easy to score and enter Uni ar? haha.

However in year 2, i could not remember when and how did i wanted to be a pilot. there was a sudden craze in my class to be a pilot. we did alot of research on how to be one. i decided to be a pilot. But there is still one factor that had plagued and dented my chances to be a flight crew in SIA. i did not satisfy the requirements for cadetship. i had FUCKING failed my english!! and applicants have to pass english and some other subjects in ONE siting. i really hope SIA be lenient with the requirements so that i can have the chance to put up a strong case. I went for this Air Transport Pilot Theory course. my dad paid for the course. $4000. and I missed the application for the Etihad airways cadetship.

Friends families asked me why did i not apply for RSAF? erm. i did apply. i had even signed a contract that they OFFERED to me. let me stress this point. RSAF had OFFERED me a contract and i SIGNED for it. I SIGNED on it. I SIGNED on it. the rest is History.I feel very happy being posted to Police. no more army life. ‘i dun want to lead an army life, i just want to lead a simple life’ hey. its an army song eh.

i still have yet to decide if i want to take up the part time degree course in aerospace operations or should i save tt $20K to fund my pilot course in the future.

I want to be posted to APD, I want to get a Bachelor in Aviation studies.I want to work with CAAS, SIA or those big players in the aviation industry. I want to get an ATPL. I want to Fly. I WANT SIA TO ACCEPT ME AS A CADET PILOT. if else. there is no if else. I dun care what airline. as long as i can obtain the WINGS.

days, months and years and till today, my drive to be a pilot is still strong as ever.

Till then…………..

I would love to be in the transit area anytime.

Im gonna get this one!. awesome.

]]> http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/07/22/skullcrushers/feed/ 0 farhanjunior Skullcrushers http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/07/19/412/ http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/07/19/412/#comments Sun, 19 Jul 2009 12:16:18 +0000 farhanjunior http://farhanjunior.wordpress.com/2009/07/19/412/ ]]>

Nobody can guarantee u success. But YOU can guarantee yourself to be committed to achieve success!